Yet, this life is hard on the whole family. This makes me so sad. I'll tell her that we are strictly friends for now on. I've found it extremely difficult particularly as he does not know how to communicate. And the nonmember spouse may just put pressure on the member spouse to spend more time with them.
We are now in Residency, have moved each year and started a new adventure each year since marriage. While it's true that Mormons are not one-dimensional and completely predictable, the odds of a successful relationship, given the OP's description of his girlfriend, are slim. I would say though that racial differences are NOT like religious differences, certainly not those between Mo and Nomo. Unconditional love, excellent communication, and unwavering support. There was a decrease in pay but an increase in our quality of life already. My husband has gone from proselytizing and thinking he knows it all to a real spiritual seeker, albeit with a strong testimony in the church. Also not one Nickel will be tithed out of any shared funds. This has led to more arguments than ever before and I feel so alone This is all very helpful.
I agree she should be able to watch a movie or do her own research. Mormonism is a big thing for those who follow the faith, so Sundays and the occasional event depending on how much she does extra might distract her. In some cases you can just simply live together with differing religions. There are plenty of marriages between Mormons and non-Mormons. Long story short, everyone is dead on. It would be foolish to acquiesce a Mormon girl to drink coffee. It sounds like you HAVE done your best in the past. Learn all you can.
This is how I felt when I married my exmo husband. Why Mormons don't hate gay people. She still has another year of residency but I am hoping she chooses a specialty that is not as demanding on her time. Even selfish at times. Going along with her cult might feel fine when it is just you in her, but if you have kids, it will be very different.